It’s cliche, but true. I’ve been lucky thus far to have a really strong support system that literally lifts me up when I’m scrounging at rock bottom. It’s tough dealing with chronic sickness that seems like there isn’t a light at the end of the tunnel, but sometimes you just need that safety net to not let you pull the plug just yet. That’s not to say I won’t have more horrible, drop-to-my-knees, wish-I-was-gone days…but I guess that’s a reflection of life. It’s an ebb and flow kind of thing that brings you good swells and bad ones.
There are days when I hardly puke at all, and then there are days where I’m bleeding and crying and choking from all the symptoms. One of my doctors suggested I might have caught a virus while visiting China last winter…and the lifespan of these bugs is about a year. Ya don’t say? So while I ride this out and wait for results I had from a procedure done last week, I hold tight to the fact that I’m still here.
I know the last post was bleak beyond belief, but hey, it was real and that’s what I was going through at that moment. I’ve found the best way to feel better about everything going on is to be honest about it-not feeling well, tell others so they don’t think I’m upset for a different reason.
This blog has been a nice outlet to document, when I get the chance, the highlights and lowlights of this year sans law school. To date, I’ve had two pretty significant procedures in the last few weeks. The first was a “SmartPill Test,” which was a little camera/monitor I swallowed, and had to wear a fancy little computer on my hip to sync the data to. The results from this test were unremarkable, other than it took 17, I repeat, SEVENTEEN hours for my stomach to digest the pill. Most people take 3-6 hours…so something is definitely funky in that region.
The other test I had done was an endoscopy, which is like a colonoscopy (which I’ve also had done earlier this year when things started to go apeshit, health-wise)…except instead of going up the butt like a colonoscopy, it goes down the throat. Biopsies were taken to figure out if I have an allergy in my throat or stomach to things that I eat, so I’m eagerly awaiting to see if that test has any better answers as to why I’ve been so sick.
Anywhoo, I’m going to try to make more of an effort to plan for “fun” every week, as I will have more time as my Master classes wrap up for the holidays (yay, just a thesis left after this). I guess when you’re so sick, you really have to make time and effort to be positive…so that’s what I’m going to do.
Today’s “effort” will be going to the grocery store with my mom, grabbing a smoothie (yay, dinner!), and cleaning my god-awful room that looks like it got taken by surprise by a hurricane…
Until Soon,
kissed.with.a.quip.
