So I’m all fired up, and that’s usually the best time to write, so here it goes. I just finished watching an episode of MTV’s “Catfish,” where a guy who had been talking to a girl for three years finally meets her. Unlike the other ten million episodes where it turns out to be a dude or a horribly unattractive person, the girl was the one in the pictures, problem was-she was stepping out on her boyfriend to talk to this guy and never told either of them.
Fast forward to the end of the episode where they meet, and eventually the two try dating for real. However, once they do so, they end up breaking up because of a snapchat where she was on some other guy and she denied it. Who knows what the real story was, but it got me thinking about cheating.
I know the main point of this blog is to document my health, but you can only talk about the shitty parts of life so much. I mean, cheating is shitty, but I have yet to come to an understanding how it happens.
See, you either fall into one of two categories-
- You love your person so much you couldn’t imagine being with anyone else, so much so, you might even worry that they’d step out on you (but probably wouldn’t if they’re in this same category).
- The other category is that the person is in a relationship, but when tempted or enticed with another option that’ll put out more regularly, do something their main person wouldn’t/etc, then the person will, without much/if any hesitation, cheat.
I don’t get it. If you’re in category two, bounce. Say adios and mess around. Maybe there’s some allure in being taken but knowing someone else wants you. I get that. I’ve toyed with that idea (as seen in a post a few back). However, upon closer reflection, I realized when you’ve got a good thing, there is absolutely no reason to mess it up. If things weren’t working out, then cool, onto the next Juan (haha, a dating pun). But if they are, why mess with the possibility that you could end up with neither?
Now I’m not naiive, I know there are bad relationships-been there, done that. Abusive relationships are hard to leave, and sometimes stepping out might be the only way to escape…but short of that situation, for the 99% of people who just can’t keep it in their pants, WHY.
Cheating creates this cycle of blame where people say they can’t trust in later relationships. Cheating creates this always looming sense of distrust, and to me, it’s really sad. If you’re interested in someone else, cut your losses and bounce. If you’re not happy, leave. Yeah, breaking up is hard to do (there’s a whole bunch of songs about it), but it’s not impossible.
I applaud every soul that was one and done-you marry your high school sweetheart and call it a day. For me, it took many, MANY frogs before I finally found a guy who felt different from all the rest. I wouldn’t say he’s perfect by any means, but he loves me at my worst (both hangry and sickly).
I do think there’s such a thing as settling, and cheating to keep your relationship “fresh” is a copout to true happiness on your end and a bitch move to your significant other.
My guy has referred to this as the ‘monkey” theory, mainly with girls, who only dump guys once they have another one lined up to “swing” onto.
Well, that’s my two cents. I don’t get it, and I know that cheating just leaves broken hearts and sometimes broken glass.
Spoonie Adventures in Books, Beauty, & Bullshit
I'm a twenty-something year old recent law and business school grad living with a chronic health condition. Follow along on my shenanigans.