Travel | A Spoonie’s Guide to Vegas

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Living with a chronic illness has literally sucked the party girl out of me. A few years ago, I was the one who told people they were boring for going to bed before 10pm on a Friday night. Now, I’m the one who’s tucked in with Netflix and a cup of tea instead of raging at the clubs.

SO, when I travel, why would my game be any different? I love to eat (you probably wouldn’t have thought so because I throw up 85% of what I eat, thank you #StomachDisorder). But really, I love food-the ambiance of a restaurant’s decor, the seemingly endless ways dishes can be put together, not to mention the bursts of flavor and overall joy ya get when dining with loved ones.

I recently traveled to Las Vegas with my boyfriend to see the Backstreet Boys (best anniversary gift ever). While we were there, we ate…and ate…and took in the sights. When I travel, I try to pack in as much bang for my buck as possible, so a little sightseeing here, a little snacking here, ya get the point. So without further adieu, the “Spoonie’s Guide to Las Vegas.”

FOOD

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Egglut at the Cosmo: the best place on the strip to get a smoothie! Jokes-the name says it all. This spot is all about eggs. I’d recommend the namesake dish, the “Eggslut,” which is a coddled egg on top of potato purée, gently nestled in a glass jar with salt, chives, and some baguette.” Personally, I don’t think it comes with nearly enough baguette, but it’s a unique dish that goes well with their homemade biscuits.

>>PRO TIP: Arrive early (like 8am early), or be prepared for a bit of a wait. I think we waited something like 30+ minutes and there isn’t much seating if it’s crowded. There’s also a fun juice place around the corner…and if you’re stopping by at night, the world-famous #ChandelierBar is nearby as well!

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Bacchanal Buffet at Caesars: hands down one of the best buffets in Las Vegas. It’s a bit pricey (upwards of $50 for dinner, without drinks) and it usually doesn’t have coupons like other buffets, but it’s so worth it.

>>PRO TIP: Get there early because it does get crowded, but if you have a big group, there’s a special line (so be sure to ask the host before standing in the other line)!

SNACKS

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Milk: crack pie. If you don’t know what it is, look it up. It’s a life-changing dessert that I’d eat for breakfast, lunch, and dinner if I could (but really, I can eat like two pieces in a sitting it’s that good).

>>PRO TIP: This is also next door to Momofoku, so if you’re in the market for ramen, stop by there as well!

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Jimmy Buffet’s Margaritaville: Because who doesn’t like a margarita in a portable (albeit plastic) blender? This place is cute, has food if you’re famished, and overall a fun stop along the strip.

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Taco Bell Cantina: I’m mildly obsessed with Taco Bell and this is the first one in the world that serves margaritas, so, if you’re remotely into chalupas or tacos, give it a visit.

>>PRO TIP: There’s patio seating that’s A+ for people watching. No need to buy tickets to a show, there’s plenty of entertainment right outside anytime of the day or night.

SIGHTS

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The Neon Museum: this place is like old-school Vegas with original neon signs, lots of history, and great photo opportunities. A random point to mention, but super appreciated as a spoonie is the fact that a bathroom trip is built into the tour…always, always appreciated. One of my favorite signs here was one of the first “drive through chapels” right next to an old laundry sign that said “the cleaners.” Ironic? I think not…but when in Vegas!

>>PRO TIP: Book your tickets ahead of time online. This’ll get you your desired time (the night time tours book up QUICK), plus if you’re coming with more than a few people, you’re guaranteed to be together on the tour.

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The Flamingos at the Flamingo: It’s a hotel whose mascot is a flamingo…and if you go inside, there’s a little pool with flamingos that’re worth a picture or two. Or, if you’re like me, you can get your boyfriend to pose with one leg up (like a flamingo) without prompting. It makes for great Christmas card material.

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The Linq Promenade: right in front of the Linq Hotel and the circular contraption behind it (aka the Linq, which looks an awful lot like the London Eye…but it has a bar in each pod, which makes it infinitely more fun). There are lots of little shops and things to see. We picked up some street art here (you know, the ones with the spray can artists that make crazy paintings). There’s also a Sprinkles (yay, cupcakes!) and Gordon Ramsey’s Fish and Chips restaurant (perfect for a quick bite).

TIPS AND TRICKS

-Be sure to hydrate, as it’s usually much hotter here than elsewhere. Also, because of the heat, there’s a lot of air-conditioning, so as someone who has to keep a close eye on my body temp, I like to carry a little sweater with me so I don’t freeze while I’m inside (but I don’t wear it outside otherwise I’ll overheat).

-If you’re flying in and want to catch an Uber from the airport to the strip, TNCs (what Ubers are called, or ride shares), are located in a different part of the airport that’s tough to get to if you have to lug a bunch of bags). It’s past the baggage claim through a parking garage, so if you call an Uber when you get off the plane, it’ll be a 10-15 minute walk before you’re there…and some Ubers may not wait…so I’d recommend requesting one once you’re in the ride share lot.

That’s my quick and dirty guide to Vegas. Of course there are a lot of fine dining and drinking spots on the strip, but if you’re looking for those spots, I’d recommend calling ahead and making a reservation because the lines get long (and no one likes a hangry bitch…aka story of my life, every damn day, especially when traveling).

So what’re your favorite spots on the strip?! Any must-sees? Shows you’re dying to go to? (I’m a fan of the Cirq shows, especially O! and the Beatles one).

Share your best tips below in the comments or on Insta @2LWithIt.

Cheers!

kissed.with.a.quip.

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Spoonie Adventures in Books, Beauty, & Bullshit

I'm a 25 year old law and business student living with a chronic health condition. Follow along on my shenanigans.

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